Your New Years Resolutions Are In Danger
Research shows that 80% of New Year's resolutions fail by the beginning of February (Forbes.com). And I feel like I am safe in assuming that we have all been there. You may be a little hungover, there’s glitter all over the floor, but there is also a delicious feeling of fresh starts in the air; that crisp, renewed sense of possibility. You make a list, even if it’s just in your head. This is the year; the year that you become a familiar face at the gym, you finish writing the novel that’s been bouncing around your head for five years, the year that you start that hobby and become so proficient that it becomes part of your whole image. People will start to know you as the quirky girl who knits. For real this time.
So you buy the tennis shoes, the knitting needles, the how-to books, and you start off with a bang. Your hangover is gone, you’ve returned the sequin outfit you so pragmatically left the tags on, and all that remains is the determination to become the new person you always knew you could be. You probably hit that for about a week, less if you are like me, more if you are an even more impressive specimen. But certainly, by week three, the majority of us are sore and have started to really hate the smell of fresh 5AM air. And slowly but surely, the New Year’s resolutions get quietly filed back in the drawer next to our high school backpacking through Europe plans and our carefully laid strategy to meet and marry our celebrity crushes. And there they stay, only to be pulled back out for the occasional self-inflicted guilt trip and inevitably at the beginning of yet another year when we try it all over again.
So the cycle goes.
But while this may seem like a sad or jaded story, there is hope to be found. Even the fact that we continue every year to make big plans for ourselves (though they rarely come to fruition) says a lot about our tenacity as people. And every year we can go a little further. One of my absolute favorite mantras is
I repeat this to myself almost compulsively, and I love it because, in the end, you don’t have to stage a complete overhaul of your life, with unrealistic expectations and unsustainable new habits. You just change one small thing at a time, the best you can, and one day you will look up and find that all of the small changes have added up to something amazing. Your life will actually look different. It may not be dramatic or upend your world, but there will definitely be growth and accomplishment. I can personally attest to that.
Today I am compiling inspiration, finding resources and ideas to breathe new life into my waning motivation. In my search, I hope you find some camaraderie and encouragement.
Write more; submit often
My fellow writers out there, you know how difficult this can be. Just like with any goal this requires so much mental energy and good time management which can be absurdly difficult to scrounge up when you have everything else in your life knocking you off balance.
Inspiration: Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life - Anne Lamott
"Thirty years ago my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report on birds written that he'd had three months to write. [It] was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas, and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books on birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him, put his arm around my brother's shoulder, and said. 'Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.'"
I dug this out of a box of “free to a good home” books left outside a professor’s office in my university’s English department. The anecdote on the back cover resonated so deeply with me. It has sat on my overcrowded shelves for years, traveling with me in move after move, and I can’t wait to actually crack it open.
Inspiration: #Girlboss - Sophia Amoruso
The true story of a dumpster-diving misfit who manages to turn her passions into a massive success. This is a book that’s always in the back of my brain (and bookshelf) when I am hunting for motivation to give my career path some juice. I’ve never gotten around to reading it, but I think it’s finally time.
Read more
I got my butt kicked in my friend groups’ reading competition last year, but this year I’m gunning for number one. It would be absolutely impossible to read every book that I want to finish in my lifetime - but I am going to do my damnedest
Inspiration: Educated - Tara Westover
Education is a privilege. Literacy is an (alarmingly rare) precious gift. This book is an excellent (and true) example of these tenets even within our country and age. Recognizing what a privilege reading is, makes my TBR pile take on a whole new light, and pushes me to make the most of it.
For more inspiration, you might chat with a librarian for new book suggestions, fall in love with a new literary podcast (I cohost one called Novel Nashville, and we would love to have you), or start tracking your reading in a reading journal. I use the Jack Edwards reading log, but there are tons of really cool alternatives out there.
Be intentional with my physical health
In the spirit of transparency, this goal has a lot to do with how I look. I would like to fit back into the clothes I have recently grown out of and not cry every time I have to find an outfit for date night. But I also don’t feel great, and I know that the food I have been putting in my body isn’t in any way what you would call “quality”... or “food”. (A Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme might taste like heaven come down, but it’s not doing crap to fuel my body.)
For me it might be losing weight, for you, it might be quitting smoking or training to run a 5K. Either way, you may find inspiration here:
The Midnight Library - Matt Haig
While this book doesn’t *specifically* apply to weight loss or health goals, it covers making decisions to change your life, which feels relevant. As a bonus, if you are looking to read this with friends, Novel Nashville has a full month dedicated to this read.
Organize and declutter
Soooooo much clothing and not a thing to wear…
Inspiration: The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning - Margareta Magnusson
It didn’t take more than the title to land this book on my TBR list, but should you be a cooler customer, this book boasts humor and practical tips for embracing minimalism and becoming “more comfortable with the idea of letting go”.
When it comes to New Year’s resolutions, or really any goals you’re working toward, you don't have to be perfect. Strive to be better than you were yesterday, give yourself grace, and celebrate your wins with great ferocity. We are on our way.
